FREE COMPETITIONS, FREE QUIZ QUESTIONS

1. Santa Claus had the right idea: visit people once a year.
   Victor Borge Dane b.1909 moved to US and toured worldwide as concert pianist and comedian
   
   
2. I played Santa Claus many times, and if you don't believe it, check out the divorce settlements awarded my wives.
   Groucho Marx The least well known of this figure's siblings was Milton nicknamed Gummo
   
   
3. The prospect of Christmas appals me.
   Evelyn Waugh born 1903 novelist father of a novelist son the works include Scoop, Men at Arms, Vile Bodies
   
   
4. Now is the accepted time to make your regular annual good resolutions. Next week you can begin paving hell with them as usual.
   Mark Twain This figure's career began on the Mississippi which is the source of the well known pen name
   
   
5. Good resolutions are simply cheques that men draw on a bank where they have no account.
   Oscar Wilde The middle names of this famous if not infamous figure were Fingal O'Flahertie Wills
   
   
6. Father Christmas and the Tooth Fairy are part of the charm of childhood. So is God. Some of us grow out of all three.
   Richard Dawkins born 1951 the professor of the public understanding of science at Oxford and author of The Selfish Gene
   
   
7. What I don't like about office Christmas parties is looking for a job the next day.
   Phyllis Diller US pioneer of female stand-up born 1917 wrote autobiography Like a Lampshade in a Whorehouse - according to Wikipedia is still in Guinness Book Records for achieving 12 punchlines per minute
   
   
8. That's the true spirit of Christmas: people being helped by people other than me.
   Jerry Seinfeld born 1954 in Brooklyn had a successful eponymous sit-com in the 1990s and wrote best selling funny book Seinlanguage
   
   
9. I once bought my kids a set of batteries for Christmas with a note on it saying toys not included.
   Bernard Manning born 1930 Ancoats Manchester, catholic claiming Jewish and Russian antecedents - but still possibly best known as an alleged racist
   
   
10. The only blind person at Christmas is he who has not Christmas in his heart.
    Helen Keller (Becoming deaf and blind at 19 months this figure became a lecturer and a writer and a subject of the 1962 film The Miracle Worker)
    
    
11. Christmas at my house is always at least six or seven times more pleasant than anywhere else. We start drinking early. And while everyone else is seeing only one Santa Claus we'll be seeing six or seven.
    WC Fields (1941 film Never Give A Sucker An Even Break in which he plays himself in a script based on his own material)
    
    
12. From a commercial point of view if Christmas did not exist it would be necessary to invent it.
    Katharine Whitehorn - Roedean, Observer column 1960-1996, rector of Saint Andrews University 1982-85 - wrote Cooking in a Bedsitter (1961) - 'When it comes to housework the one thing no book of housekeeping can ever tell you is how to begin. Or maybe I mean why.'